Light as a feather, letting go of all the worries and all the struggles, vowing to shine my light onto the world.
I grew up an anxious little kid and basically struggled with anxiety throughout my life.
My highly sensitive personality made all aspects of life challenging and I remember being in a lot of pain not mentioning the emotional overwhelm I felt on a daily basis.
Always trying to please people so they hopefully would reciprocate and be accepting of me.
There was this underlying, refrigerator hum-like buzz in my body that was telling me that the world isn’t safe. It’s not safe to be at home, and it’s not safe to be at school.
I was intimidated not only by my parents but by all authoritative figures in my life.
I stuffed down the feelings of inadequacy and not being good enough and manifested the belief that there’s something wrong with me, that I’m different and that I’ll never fit in.
All the anger and frustration kept building up but I never channeled it externally, I rather sucked it all up and internalized it which led to my physical body to respond with symptoms like headaches and fatigue - I was only in my mid 20ies.
Ten years later my stress levels went through the roof and I was bedridden with chronic pain - I had reached rock-bottom. My time had come to embark on my new journey, the path to gaining new insights, the path to awakening, the path to liberation, the path to finding the truth, the path to becoming who I always was but never dared to be.
We all have fear and it’s a vital and integral protection mechanism of our brain to prevent us from harm. Our bodies are made to cope with acute stress. However, the lingering, slow-burning anxiety that stays with you over years depletes the body of its resources and leads to dysregulation of all bodily systems.
Childhood traumas and neglect are buried deep in our subconscious mind.
The information is stored as a memory in form of pictures and sensory perceptions alongside emotions. We can train our brain in a way where we break those habitual patterns. Neuroplasticity means that even deeply entrenched neural pathways can be rewired if we put in enough effort.
Ok, here are a few tools that completely changed my life..
1) Mindfulness is powerful. Whenever you feel anxious or stressed, stop whatever you’re doing and slow down. Say “stop, stop, stop” and become present.
Close your eyes, taste your mouth, take a deep breath in, smell, check in with both of your eyes, focus your attention there, what do you hear on your left? What do you hear on your right? Imagine the space in front, behind, left, right, above and below you, count slowly to 7 and take another deep breath.
You can do this everywhere and it only takes you 15 seconds to do one round with a little bit of practice.
2) Reframing is another amazing technique. What this means is that you ask questions to put things into perspective.
When you get triggered and feel anxious, say “stop, stop, stop” and ask yourself, what just happened, why am I feeling this? Where does it come from?
Once you’ve identified the source reframe and try to be more objective:
What’s the worst that can happen? Is your reaction appropriate? Do you feel safe right now? Are you still breathing, is your heart still beating in your chest?
This is called putting things into Powerful Perspective.
It takes practice and all starts with you becoming aware of the patterns that you are running that mostly go unnoticed by you.
3) Self-compassion is an important building block when it comes to overcoming anxious thoughts and feelings.
Being mindful of your patterns and confronting your thoughts of inferiority and inadequacy with being kind and gentle to yourself.
I was always the nicest person you could imagine on the outside but my internal dialogue was negative, assigning blame to myself and verbally abusing myself in my own head.
Learn to support yourself, to encourage yourself and treat yourself with respect.
You are human, you make mistakes, and you are not perfect.
Maybe that voice you hear in your head is someone else’s voice?
Cut yourself some slack and realize that everyone is struggling in one way or another. Be kind to yourself. Become best friends with yourself.
It’s about nurturing and helping the child that’s within to heal.
Touch your shoulder, squeeze it and acknowledge yourself for all the great things that you do throughout the day. You are a wonderful human being.
Please remember, healing takes time and a lot of effort but it’s so rewarding to go on that journey and learn about yourself, who you truly are. All the effort this takes is all worth it as you’ll create more peace of mind and more stillness in your body – a feeling that is indescribably beautiful, humbling and wondrous at the same time. Now get out there and shine your light onto the world.
Founder of Moonsun Malibu